S1:E13 | The Beauty Of Therapy!

S1:E13 | The Beauty Of Therapy!

TDMP 13 | The Beauty Of Therapy

 

Therapy is a beautiful addition to your life.

It can help you uncover the underlying causes of your worries and fears.

It helps us to figure out what is it in our lives that either consciously or subconsciously could be affecting us still today.

There are lots of ways to stimulate happy hormones that will greatly help us cope with negatives.

Listen to this episode and find out what worked with Destiny and DJ Dezzee. Who knows, this could work for you too!

Listen to the podcast here

 

The Beauty Of Therapy!

What’s going on everybody? It’s Destiny Malibu and my co-host.

DJ Dezzee.

We are so excited to be here. If you are new to the Destiny Malibu show, it is a mental health-focused show. Where we talk about something that I feel like a lot of times goes under the radar, and it’s something that not a lot of people talk about. Living in Sin City, all the fun, and all of the good times in Vegas, it’s important to get a little in there about mental health.

We are so excited to be partnering with Virgin Hotels Las Vegas, and talking about this important topic. Something that we have been discussing on the show is something that we consider here, the pyramid for having quality mental health. We call it the Seven Pillars of Mental Health. We have been talking about it.

You can go back to the previous episodes and get an idea of how that works, and these pillars that we are talking about. We are talking about self-love, purpose, social life, the importance of quality social life, exercise, and food. We are going to be talking about the 6th and the 7th pillar of mental health that we are so excited to be discussing. The sixth one that we are going to be starting with is going to be about therapy. Therapy is something that is so pivotal to having quality mental health. Both Dezzee and I have been in therapy, and it’s something that has improved both of our lives.

The first time I started my first session in 2021 when I had just gone through a breakup. I was 28 years old. I was like, “What is going to happen in my life?” I don’t know what’s next for me. I needed someone to talk to. I reached out to several therapists, and I found the one that worked for me. She was absolutely amazing. She helped me realize that I don’t need anybody to make me happy, and I figured out how to do it on my own. I am happy and single, and I’m living my best life.

I’m single too, in case anybody’s out there. Therapy is something that is such a beautiful addition to your life. We were just talking to our friend Christina over here. She was saying she is in the mental health game, and she goes to therapy once a week. I have gone to therapy and it has improved my life so much. There’s so much you can learn from having a therapy session.

Therapy is such a beautiful addition to your life. Click To Tweet

I think sometimes, you hear people. I have told people before who have thought about going to therapy, but are unsure like, “Why would I need therapy? Why am I going to pay someone money just to talk? That sounds silly. Why would I need to spend my money that way? Why would I need to do that?” The beautiful thing about therapy is that it helps us to figure out what is it in our lives that either consciously or subconsciously could be affecting us still.

Whether it was a divorce growing up, a childhood trauma, or an experience you had. Talking is the number one prevention when you are struggling with mental health. When you are talking to a professional. Sometimes you might go in there thinking that you are going to be helping one area of your life that you think you know you need help with. Discover that there’s a whole other area that you had no idea that you could tap into, discuss, learn about, and grow from. Figure out what it is in your life that could be contributing to some of the potential struggles that you might be having.

We want to encourage you to seek out talking to a professional, and getting that help from someone who’s trained. If seeing a professional at this time in your life is not something financially you could do, or it’s not something in your schedule that you can fit in at the time. There are so many amazing options out there.

There are companies like BetterHelp, which is online therapy, which you can do for a fraction of the price, which is a really amazing company. If doing individual therapy sounds a little too intense at first, there are different types that you could step into. There’s group therapy which I think is an awesome one. Sometimes, if you have never done it before, it can feel a little intimidating to step into the room with someone and talk about your whole life story.

Group therapy, it’s a nice introduction to being with other like-minded people and people who also want to grow, develop, and increase the quality of their mental health. There’s group therapy, family therapy, couple therapy, and also, pet therapy, which I’m a big fan of. If you didn’t know, Virgin Hotels Las Vegas is a pet-friendly hotel. If you guys have pets, you can bring them here. I’m missing my doggies right now. I wish we would have brought them. I don’t know why we didn’t. They are being babysat right now, but I’m missing them even though we only stayed here for two nights.

At my previous job managing a WeWork building, there was a lady, and she was all like, “Did you know that miniature horses are pet therapy?” They are the cutest little things. She brought it into our building. She got a whole tour with everyone in the whole building. The little horse giddy-upped all around. It was so cute.

I’m so excited that Dezzee told me this because now I have so much ammunition and reason for why I need a miniature horse. If I didn’t already have that already, I’m going to be searching for one, and we are going to bring it to the Virgin Hotel. It’s really cool to know that even if meeting with a professional isn’t something that you are wanting to do at this moment. There’s even pet therapy. Having a pet around in your life, and having that energy from an animal is healing.

Yes, because they do feel your emotions. They know when you are sad. They know when you are angry. They give you unconditional love. I definitely recommend doing some pet therapy.

Yes, that is one of my favorite ones. I can’t wait to go home and hug my baby doggies. Another thing we want to talk about. If talking to someone is not something that you are looking to do at the moment, there are also alternative therapies. There are things that you can do to strengthen your mental health that seems simple, but a lot of times are overlooked.

Things like journaling, taking a bath, and self-care, which can also cross into another pillar that we were talking about before, which is self-love. Taking care of yourself and finding things that you can incorporate into your life on a weekly basis that feels therapeutic. That improve your quality of life and improve your mental health, it’s so important. Something else that I wanted to touch on is the importance of nutritional therapy. This is something that I also feel gets overlooked a lot of times.

I want a little disclaimer. We are not doctors, so for anything that we share with you, make sure that you are consulting with your physicians or a professional. We are here to be your online best friends, be your Vegas girls. Talk with you guys, hang out with you, and discuss things that have helped us and have worked for us.

Mental health is something that hits home and is one of the reasons why I’m so passionate about this topic, because I, myself have had some struggles. I’m an artist. I’m an extremely emotional person. I have had my down moments in my life. I have had close friends that have also struggled with mental health. This is something that I’m extremely passionate about.

I want to share with you guys what has helped me because it took me many years to figure out what methods and what things I can incorporate into my life that would help me. One of the things that I want to share with you is the benefit of nutritional therapy. Something that I found fascinating is, quite a few years ago when I was struggling with my mental health, I went to go see a doctor.

I was like, “I think I’m going to need to be starting a medication or something. I don’t know what to do. I’m at a low point and I think I need to seek out some serious help.” Something that my doctor told me was like, “No problem. We can absolutely do that. There’s nothing wrong if we need to do that, but let’s get your vitamin D3 levels checked.”

She told me, “I have seen many people struggling with mental health where they get their vitamin D levels checked and it ends up being low.” I had no idea that this was a thing and I feel like it’s not talked about enough. I want to read to you guys some of the symptoms of having low vitamin D levels. Having low vitamin D levels can also be very similar symptoms to clinical depression.

It can be mood changes accompanied by overwhelming feelings of sadness or hopelessness, fatigue, forgetfulness, loss of interest in activities that previously sparked excitement, anxiety, loss of appetite, excessive weight loss, or gained trouble sleeping, and more. If you are experiencing any of those things, I encourage you to talk with your doctor. Consider getting your vitamin D levels checked.

We went and got mine checked. Sure enough, they were low. I started supplementing with vitamin D3. Every single week to this day, I go to Regenerate Medical Concierge in Vegas. I get vitamin D3 shots every single week. I cannot tell you how life-changing. When I say life-changing, literally, for me at that point in my life was the difference between me wanting to continue my life or not.

It changed my life just by getting this vitamin D supplementation. Again, I’m not a doctor, Dezzee is not a doctor. Check with your physicians, but I encourage you guys to get that checked. That might be something that could be low, that a lot of times can be overlooked. It could save someone’s life. I want to share that with you and emphasize how important it’s to get those vitamin D3 levels checked. Even though we are in Las Vegas and we are in the sun, vitamin D typically comes from the sun. It is in some foods, but mostly from the sun.

In Seattle or London where it’s glooming cloudy all the time, a lot of those tend to have lower mental health because they are not exposed to enough vitamin D.

That’s statistically a very common thing that people in areas where it’s gloomy a lot, where it’s raining, that there are higher rates of mental health struggles and depression. Personally, even though we are in a sunny city, I don’t go in the sun that much because I’m trying not to get wrinkles. I’m trying to protect my skin. At the same time, there are pros and cons to everything.

That literally could save someone’s life. I want to emphasize that to you. That’s an important one. We want to let you guys know that this pillar of therapy is so important. There’s nothing to be ashamed of in seeking professional help. Talking with somebody is so beneficial for your mental health, and can improve your life so much.

There's nothing to be ashamed of about seeking professional help. Talking with somebody is beneficial for your mental health, and can really improve your life. Click To Tweet

Get those vitamin D levels checked because it was life-changing for me. I think it could be life-changing for a lot of you out there who may be struggling. Make sure you come to the Virgin Hotels Las Vegas because we care about mental health here. We are all about the fun, we are all about the partying, and we are all about having a good time. We also want to make sure you guys are mentally doing good. We are here to be your family. We are here to be your online friends. We want you guys to be a part of the community. You can go to DestinyMalibuPodcast.com to learn more information.

We have got some acoustic music coming up. I am an artist, I am a singer, as well as a podcaster. Dezzee is a DJ. We got some musicians here with us. We are going to be singing some music for you. Make sure you check out my music, it’s Destiny Malibu. My Instagram, @DestinyMalibu. We are always talking about music and going over things like mental health with the show. Give us a follow, and we are so happy to be hanging out with you.

We are going to end it with our mantra, The Destiny Malibu Angel Squad mantra, which is something we like to say because it brings us together and it’s a really important message to remember. If you know it, say it with us. “If you hate, I love you. If you love me, I love you even more. You are not alone. We are in this together.” We love you guys so much. We will see you in the next episode. We are going to be doing some music for you. We love you.

 

Important Links

S1:E11 | Will This Grow Your “Mental Muscle”?

S1:E11 | Will This Grow Your “Mental Muscle”?

TDMP 11 | Mental Muscle

 

On to today’s episode…

Destiny spends a lot of time talking about the Seven Pillars of mental health. Today, she focuses on another one.

This pillar is easy to overlook. We often don’t associate it with mental health. We often don’t feel like doing it.

But when we do it? The benefits—physical, emotional and mental—are AMAZING! It can make us healthier and give us a dramatic mood lift.

In fact, a study from Harvard Medical School shows that, for some people who suffer from depression, this pillar works as well as antidepressants.

And it’s something we can do anywhere.

So what is it? Listen Now!

Listen to the podcast here

 

Will This Grow Your “Mental Muscle”?

We have some exciting news. We are going to be talking also about another one of the seven pillars of mental health. We have talked about self-love, purpose, and social life, and now we are going to be talking about exercise.

Everybody’s favorite thing to do.

For a lot of us, sometimes it’s hard to get up and move, especially when our phones are so entertaining.

We are tired from work all day and we are like, “Do I want to go to the gym right now?”

Exercise is so pivotal for quality mental health. I noticed a dramatic difference in my mood when I started making it a priority to exercise regularly.

For me too. When I am stressed or angry about something, my go-to thing is to move around, go for a walk, dance, or go to the gym to get that tension out of my body.

I want to read to you an awesome fact from Harvard Medical School. It says, “For some people, exercise works as well as antidepressants.” That’s insane. What an incredible tool we have at our fingertips. When I’m having a tough day or a difficult day, what can I do to help myself to get out of this mood or whatever it is? When I go to the gym, even if I don’t want to go initially, I always feel so much better.

It says, “Although exercise alone isn’t enough for someone with severe depression,” for those of you who are on medication, that’s totally fine. This is also even an additional thing that we can add to our regimen, regardless of, what that looks like for you. It says, “People who are depressed, neuroscientists have noticed that the hippocampus in the brain, the region that helps regulate mood is smaller. Exercise supports nerve cell growth in the hippocampus improving nerve cell connections, which helps relieve depression.”

That’s awesome.

This is huge. We often hear these things like, “Drink water or exercise,” whatever it is. It goes in one ear and out the other. Sometimes like, “The old adage of exercise.” Exercising is so beneficial for our lives.

If you think about it, that’s saying the hippocampus is a growing muscle. When you go and work out, you are growing your physical muscles, but you are also growing your mental muscles.

When you go and work out, you're growing your physical muscles, but you're also growing your mental muscles. Click To Tweet

That’s such a good point. That’s fascinating. It creates new neuro connections in the hippocampus. Desiree and I both love to be active in different ways.

She’s more of a gym girl.

I’m a gym girl. Shout out to my gym people.

I am more of a go out and dance, do a sport, or something like that.

I have gotten into line dancing with Desiree. We do that every single week. Sometimes I’m able to get Desiree to the gym with me.

I try to go about once a week. Once a week I’m like, “I don’t get to go dancing. Let’s go hit the gym.”

If you are not a gym person, there are so many ways to get the exercise that doesn’t have to be the gym or this insane rigorous workout.

Yes. Stretching, doing yoga, or something that’s relaxing, but stretching your muscles. I got into yoga the last few years and I did it twice a week. You can do it anywhere. If you have a yoga mat, you can do it at home or wherever. There are so many videos on YouTube on how to do it. Maybe we will even do some videos on how you do yoga.

Maybe we should. It will be fun. We will maybe do a guided workout video, even though I’m not a fitness instructor, but maybe we could show you what we do or our go-to exercises. I also want to stress the importance of fashion at the gym. It’s funny because sometimes we can forget how much an outfit can change how we are feeling. Honestly, a good outfit for a guy or girl has the ability to boost your confidence and mood. Nothing makes me want to work workout more than feeling like a gym baddie in my outfit. If I have a gym baddie outfit on, I’m like, “I have to work out. It’s non-negotiable.” Get those cute workout clothes.

As I said, it doesn’t have to be the gym. You can go on a hike, swim, play pickleball, or tennis, take a dance class, or go for a walk. As Desiree said, you can online on YouTube. It’s so amazing with technology how there are so many lessons online. I have a friend who said that they learned how to line dance from watching a YouTube video. That’s amazing.

Stretching your body is not even that vigorous, but it will improve your mood. It’s making that connection between body and mind. A lot of times we associate exercise with our physical appearance more than anything else. “I got to get shredded for summer. I got to work out to have a summer body.” The physical benefits of exercise are amazing, but for anyone who is struggling with mental health, which all of us, at some point do because we are all humans, in your mind, in my opinion, not make a physical appearance the focus because all shapes and sizes are beautiful, but make overall health the focus.

If we switch the focus from appearance to health, it’s much more encouraging. It’s much more amazing. Instead of being like, “I got to go to the gym because I ate too much,” or something like that. You wake up and go, “I got to the gym because I love myself and I need to show my body love by taking care of my health.” We want you guys to incorporate exercise. Send us to DM and let us know what your activity of choice is.

What’s your favorite thing to do for exercise?

Send us a picture or a selfie. We love to see that.

You can send it to AskDestinyMalibu.com.

We have a special announcement. We are so excited to announce that we are going to be having some upcoming shows at the Virgin Hotel in Las Vegas. Three of the shows we are going to be doing the show live at the Virgin Hotel.

You want to be there for it.

In addition, after the live show, we are going to be doing some live music and then a little meet and greet. It’s going to be so much fun. On one of the days, we are going to be having a Pre-Release Party at the Virgin Hotel. It’s for my upcoming song called Say My Name, which I am so excited for you guys to hear. Everybody that comes to The Shag Room at the Virgin Hotel for the Pre-Release Party is going to be hearing it for the very first time before anyone else.

That event will be for those 21 and over. Make sure you get your tickets as soon as possible because there is limited capacity.

I’m going to let you know the dates. The first show is going to be on October 14, 2022, for all ages. The Pre-Release Party is going to be on October 21, 2022, at The Shag Room at the Virgin Hotel, and that’s 21 plus make sure you get your tickets. The second show is going to be on November 4, 2022. The third show is going to be on December 9, 2022.

Make sure you block out those dates. Come to Las Vegas and hang out with us. It is going to be so much fun. We are so excited to be partnering with the Virgin Hotel on this. We can’t wait to see your beautiful faces, do the show live, do some live music, and share my new song with you. I am so over the moon. We are so excited because the Virgin Hotel Las Vegas is going to be giving one of our listeners a free weekend getaway at the Virgin Hotel.

If you’d like to learn how to enter that sweepstake, you can go to DestinyMalibuPodcast.com.

Make sure you enter to win, block out those dates, and come to our shows at the Virgin Hotel in Las Vegas. We love you folks so much. We hope that you enjoyed this episode. To close out the show, we got to say the Angel Squad mantra. If you are at home or wherever you are, make sure you say this out loud and it is, “If you hate me, I love you. If you love me, I love you even more. You are not alone. We are in this together.” I love you all so much and see you on the next episode.

 

Important Links

S1:E10 | Stop Repelling New Friends: Attract Good People Instead

S1:E10 | Stop Repelling New Friends: Attract Good People Instead

TDMP 10 | Attract Good People

 

On to today’s episode…

Do you ever go to a busy public place and just people watch? It’s pretty interesting, right?

It reminds us that we aren’t the only person on planet Earth. And that we’re social beings. We’re all yearning for a human connection.

And now that pandemic-related restrictions have eased up, it’s easier to get out and meet people.

Which is something Destiny really recommends you do. Why?

Because we all need to connect with other human beings. Socializing is an important pillar of mental health.

On today’s episode of The Destiny Malibu Podcast, Destiny gives you some valuable tips that can help you be more approachable and more successful at confidently putting yourself out there and making new friends.

She also gives you some ideas to help you stay safe as you go out and build your new, exciting social life.

Want to find out more? Listen now!

Listen to the podcast here

 

Stop Repelling New Friends: Attract Good People Instead

I love to people watch and sometimes, going out and being around people and realizing like, “I’m not Wall-E,” like, you go out and I’m like, “I’m not Wall-E. I’m not the only person on planet Earth.” There’s all of us out here. We’re all looking for human connection. We’re all trying to be the best versions of ourselves. There’s something extremely comforting about that. Now that restrictions have lightened up a little bit with the pandemic, we can get out there. We can explore, adventure, go and try something new. Aside from joining clubs or trying different hobbies is getting out of nature.

Get out of nature and go to the beach, go for a hike or go to the park.

You never know. Sometimes you can literally be at the beach by yourself, soaking up the sun or reading a book or at a park bench and meet somebody cool. It takes putting yourself out there and being open, having open body language, looking around, smiling at people and looking for an opportunity to make new friends.

Also, beware of creepers. Be careful.

Don’t talk to just anybody.

Trust your gut. If you ever feel any type of uncomfortable feeling with anybody, walk away immediately. Make sure it’s in a public place. Don’t go somewhere alone in the dark.

I know everybody’s different. Ideally, I would suggest not going on a hike all by yourself in the middle of nowhere.

Bring someone. You don’t want to be stuck out there for 72 hours.

Bring someone or a big dog at the very least. We want you angels to be safe out there, but in general, put yourself out there, be open, meet new people and that brings so much joy to life. Sometimes we can forget because we’re so focused on, “What am I doing? What are my goals? What am I focused on in my career? What I’ve got to do next?” Sometimes we forget to nurture this social part of our being that needs to be nurtured.

Even people who consider themselves introverts, who like to spend a lot of time alone, would benefit and do benefit from at least getting some social time. We want to encourage you to open up your social life. Open up your so social circle and make it bigger. You have your close-knit people, then you have your other people and it grows.

Whether it’s acquaintances, close friends, new relationships or best friends that you make, get out there and make sure that you are building your social life that is full of color and full of life and all kinds of different people to make your life feel fulfilled. I want these seven pillars for you folks to be something so important. We are going to be talking about more of them in the upcoming episodes but these seven pillars are so important that even I myself, who made these seven pillars, I was feeling down. I was like, “Why am I feeling so down? What’s going on?”

Make sure that you are building your social life that is full of color, full of life, and full of all kinds of different people to make your life feel fulfilled. Click To Tweet

I took out my little notebook and looked at my little diagram. I thought, “Where am I falling short on this graph?” I realized for me it was on the vitamin section. We are going to be talking about more of these in the upcoming episodes. We want to make sure that you folks are coming back because this has been so helpful for my life and my mental health journey.

To this day, these seven pillars that we are teaching you and talking about is something that it’s so easy to forget one of these categories and go, “There’s no hope. I don’t know what I’m doing,” but we do have the opportunity with these pillars to look at them at any point of our life and ask ourselves, “Where could I improve? Which category could I improve in?” You will be shocked at how beneficial that is for your life. You can use this tool at any time.

Make sure you come back for the next episode and we hope that talking about social life and hopefully, you get some ideas and realize that we all go through loneliness and sometimes we need to expand our social circle.

Sometimes we need to get out there and give somebody a hug, have some direct eye contact. It is incredible what those simple things will do for our mental health. We love you so much and we are so thankful that you are hanging out with us and are part of the Angel Squad community. We want to say the Destiny Malibu mantra/motto. If you’re at home, make sure you are saying this with us and it is, “If you hate me, I love you. If you love me, I love you even more. You are not alone. We are in this together.”

If you have any questions for our upcoming episodes, you can go ahead and submit your questions to Ask@DestinyMalibu.com.

We want to hear from you. Let us know what’s going on in your lives, what different things you are struggling with, how your social life is going, how these pillars that we’ve talked about so far have helped you, we hope. We love you so much. We’re so thankful that we get to be online best friends. We love you and we will see you on the next episode.

 

Important Links

S1:E8 | You Gotta Have THIS For Strong Mental Health!

S1:E8 | You Gotta Have THIS For Strong Mental Health!

TDMP 8 | Social Life

 

On to today’s episode…

How do you feel about being alone? Do you enjoy doing things by yourself? Do you think of friends and socializing as optional parts of your life? You know, nice to have, but not all that important?

Destiny can relate. She thought of herself as someone who was “really good at being alone”. Even when she was growing up.

But then a cascade of traumatic events happened to her and her family. And Destiny was more alone than ever before. She says she became “immensely, immensely lonely”.

It was then she made an important discovery. A discovery that’s vital for all of us in our pursuit of abundant mental health.

Want to find out more?

Listen now!

Listen to the podcast here

 

You Gotta Have THIS For Strong Mental Health!

What’s going on, everybody? It’s Destiny Malibu and my co-host, DJ Dezzee.

We’re so happy that you joined us yet again.

We are so happy you’re back. We are going to be talking about another 1 of these 7 pillars of mental health. We’ve talked about self-love and purpose, and now we are going to be talking about the importance of social life. I always considered myself someone who was good at being alone. I would often have a meal by myself. I would take drives for myself. I would go a couple of days sometimes without hanging out with somebody and doing my own thing, even though growing up, I always had my friends.

I considered myself someone who was good at being alone until our house burned down in Malibu. That was a traumatic thing. Our house burned down in the Woolsey Fire if you guys did not already know that. I have a music video about it, and a song I wrote about it. That’s called We Will Rise, and you guys can check that out. Desiree was at a mass shooting, which was terrifying, then moved to Florida right after that event happened.

I left Destiny all alone. I was there the entire time. She says she’s a lone wolf, but remember, big sister was always there.

I wasn’t necessarily a lone wolf. Desiree and I have always been best friends. People can attest that growing up. Even in high school, we shared a Facebook.

We were called Des Dez.

We shared a Facebook. We’ve always been very close, but I meant, in general, that I was comfortable doing things on my own. I didn’t think that I had a problem being alone until I actually experienced it. Desiree went to Florida and my parents and I moved to LA. Here I was in a new city. I had gone through a breakup, my sister moved, our house had burned down, Desiree had been through shooting, and there was a lot of emotion. Even though my friends were in Malibu, they were still about an hour away. I’m sure a lot of you can attest that sometimes even moving an hour away makes a dramatic difference in how often you see people. It’s hard to keep friendships when you’re in different states.

Even moving for an hour away can sometimes make a dramatic difference in how often you see people. Click To Tweet

Also, not seeing each other every day.

Often, even in different cities like I experienced. I was in a new city and I felt lonely. This is sad to say. I remember the time I spent many weekends crying in my room.

You called me on a couple of those weekends, you were like, “What are you doing, Dez?”

I don’t know if any of you guys can attest to that, but sometimes, loneliness can take over. If you’re in a new city, a new state or a new town, and you haven’t quite made those connections yet, it can be tough, not to mention all the changes that we had gone through in 2020. I’m sure many of us can relate to that feeling of overwhelming loneliness because of this pandemic.

The pandemic was a big one. Everyone was at home, and you rarely got to see anybody unless you were in a relationship.

I know that there were a lot of different struggles that came out of the pandemic. A lot of new relationships were started and ended. There was a lot of chaos going on at that time, and we’re still not fully over the craziness.

Different states have different things and different hiccups here and there, so you got to go with the flow.

A lot of us can relate, especially now worldwide, to experiencing at some point or another, an immense feeling of loneliness.

That’s literally my worst fear. My worst fear is being alone. I always like to go out and do something.

Going back to the story I was saying about how all this change was happening, we had moved to LA, and then we were in LA for about a year. We decided to move to Las Vegas. When we moved to Las Vegas, I was not only in a new city, but I was in a new state. Now I was far away from my friends. In LA, even though I didn’t see my friends every week like I was used to, I was still seeing them once a month. I had some friends come to visit me and that was super sweet. I also went out to Malibu a couple of times, but I don’t drive that often because I’m not the best driver.

It’s terrifying. I always hold onto the door when she’s driving.

I’m not terrible, but I prefer to be driven. I had people come to see me. Shout out to all my friends who came to visit me in LA. I love you. Now we’re in Nevada, Las Vegas. We’re in a new state. Thankfully, it’s not too far from LA, but it’s still a new state. We’re in lockdown. I’m in a new place. I don’t know anybody. I thought I was lonely before in LA. Desiree is still in Florida. I became immensely lonely during the pandemic. At this time, I realized the super immense importance of social life. I realized its importance at a level I had never understood before. Even though I thought that I was good at having lunch by myself sometimes or doing things by myself, I had never experienced that level of isolation.

 

Important Links

S1:E5 | Without This Important Pillar, Your Mental Health Will Suffer

S1:E5 | Without This Important Pillar, Your Mental Health Will Suffer

TDMP 5 | Finding Your Purpose

 

On to today’s episode…

What is your purpose? How do you find it? How do you live it out? These are heavy questions, right? But they’re also important. For one thing, finding and living out your purpose in your life is a critical pillar of having good mental health.

If this idea intrigues you, if you want to do a “deep dive” into it, you owe it to yourself to listen to today’s episode of the Destiny Malibu Podcast. Destiny tells the story of how she discovered her purpose at a very young age. She also talks about a special honor she received in high school that still matters to her today.

And if you haven’t discovered your purpose yet, or you have, but you feel it’s not as impressive as someone else’s purpose, she has something reassuring and comforting to tell you.

Listen to the podcast here

 

Without This Important Pillar, Your Mental Health Will Suffer

What’s going on, everybody?

We’re happy you could join us again.

We are happy you guys are back. We are going to be talking about 1 of the 7 pillars of mental health and the pillar that we are going to be discussing is purpose.

What is your purpose? What is my purpose? Let’s figure it out together.

The best way to discover what your purpose is, is to ask yourself, “What am I most passionate about?” I feel lucky that when I was little, I knew at a very young age that I wanted to pursue music, and everybody discovers their purpose at different points in life. That’s a great point that some people might know when they’re young, some people might discover what their purpose is in college, and some people might discover their purpose when they’re 50 or even 60 or 70 sometimes.

It is never too late to figure out what it is that you want to do with your life and to pursue what you are most passionate about. When Dez and I were little, we grew up around our mom in the studio all the time. Dez and I fell in love with music at a very young age. The first time that I was ever in a recording studio, or the first time that I remember recording something, I was five years old.

It is never too late to figure out what it is that you want to do with your life and to pursue what you are most passionate about. Click To Tweet

It was the Pledge of Allegiance.

It was at the beginning of a song that her mom did for a 9/11 tribute. I got to do the Pledge of Allegiance at the beginning of this song that she wrote and that was special. When I was about nine years old, I wrote my first ever song on guitar. That was the first time that at five, I was still like, “The music, this is fun,” but at nine, when I wrote my first song, I was like, “I want to do this forever. If there’s a way that I could do this and write songs for the rest of my life, that’s what I want to do.” Throughout Dezzee and my school years, we entered talent shows.

We were in choir and I feel so honored that at Malibu High I was voted most musical, which I was shocked about because I was on independent study. I remember I came back to school for an assignment or something, and they’re like, “You were voted most musical.” I was like, “No way.” I wasn’t on campus during my senior year. That was special. From a young age, I knew that this was what I wanted to do. I wanted to be an artist and I feel so lucky and blessed that I’ve been able to pursue that. Everybody can discover their purpose at different times in life.

For me, I wanted to be a veterinarian when I was an adult and I realized I don’t do well with shots for animals because things can go wrong. I passed out, so I decided, “Probably not the best route for me.”

A big part of the journey of discovering what your passion is, is trial and error. It’s exploring as many different avenues as possible to figure out what it is that makes you tick. What is it that lights up your soul and brings out this passionate, beautiful version of yourself? The version of yourself that is most passionate about something is usually a hint that that’s the direction you should go for figuring out what your purpose in life is. Justin Bieber has an album called Purpose. I feel like he’s probably an expert on this subject, JB, and Hailey too. I’m obsessed with Hailey. If you guys ever want to come on the show that would make my life. I would probably start crying, but I can keep it together. I can be cool.

Speaking of Justin Bieber. Justin, when you were first on the scene on YouTube, Destiny had you on her computer screen.

Justin was my computer screen saver.

As it was for many girls. Our big brother, Jonathan, would come in and be like, “Why is he on your computer screen?

He’s a hater. Sorry, JB, but we love you, and we love Hailey. She’s the best. A funny side note, I love that album. It’s an amazing album. It is so important to explore different hobbies and things to figure out what it is you like. I’ve talked to some people about this before. I remember I had a conversation one time, and we were at a yacht party. That was pretty cool. One of the guests there, he and I were having a conversation about life, and somehow, I always end up in those conversations with people, “What is your purpose? How’s your emotional health?”

That’s because you’re a mental health advocate that’s why.

I like to dive right in and get straight to the meat. I remember he and I were debating because he was telling me that he doesn’t think that there’s any purpose to life. This is someone that I could tell was struggling because hope is one of the most important things to hold onto in any situation, especially with your mental health. Believing in the hope of purpose is also important because if you go around with this belief that you have no purpose, I feel like subconsciously that probably does affect your psyche and make you feel depressed. You’re like, “Why am I here? There’s no point to anything.”

Just roaming around.

Something I told him, a lot of times we have a tendency to overcomplicate purpose. Just because I love music and that’s the direction I want to go with my life, someone else’s purpose might be being an incredible mother, which is equally significant. Someone else’s purpose might be being a kind person and greeting people with love and kindness and saying, “Neighbor, how are you doing?” Someone else’s purpose might be serving at the local homeless shelter. There are many ways to find purpose in life, and sometimes people get stuck because they think that you need to have this grandiose direction.

Something that I want to add to that is that our purpose is to love one another. How are you absolutely going to love each other? By helping each other. That is what I like to do. I like to say my purpose is, I like to help in whatever way I can. I’ve done many different things in my life.

Dezzee and I make a great team because I’m more of a wear-my-heart-on-my-sleeve type of person. I pretty much lead with everything I do with emotion. That’s something that makes me a great artist and songwriter because I understand people. I have a great love for people. I’m not the most spatially aware person like, “I never know where I am.”

Don’t ask Destiny for directions.

That’s what Google’s for. We complement each other in that way because we have different strengths, but we’re aware of that and those strengths tie into our individual sense of purpose.

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